Home all day Saturday October 27, 2012

It’s like she wants to be going somewhere all the time. She wanted to go to school when she woke up and dressed in the oddest combination of clothes you could imagine. This is a woman who always wore coordinated and matched outfits totally appropriate for the occasion. I took her in and changed into stay home clothes because I told her, “No school on Saturday.” I took her into the backyard to work on watering plants and watching me clean the pool, do weeding and planting. She enjoys sitting in the sun. She scares me getting too close to the edge of the pool. So I steer her toward a chair where she can watch me safely. She’s fine watching me work.

As soon as we go into the house she wants to go home again. Every day, a hundred times a day, we go through the “I’m going home now,” routine. Sometimes I can use distraction, “let’s do this first…” or I say “I wish you would stay with me because I will miss you.” Often I follow her down the driveway and she runs out of energy and comes back. Today I drove her around the neighborhood until she confessed she didn’t know where to go to get home. So we returned home I give her a Zanax and she sleeps all afternoon in front of the tv.  Some days we go through extreme range of emotions and have even been to the Urgent Care with blood pressure off the charts. But an hour later all is forgotten and back to the beginning again.

Haircut Friday October 26, 2012

Trudy has been doing Mom’s hair for many years and she does an excellent job. Each time it is cut it comes in whiter and whiter. Usually I sit and talk to Trudy while she is working on Mom’s hair, but today I had another stylist cut my hair right next to Mom and Trudy. I could hear the stories Mom was telling Trudy about how she and Daddy were traveling and going places. This was stimulated by Trudy saying she was going to Mexico on vacation. Mom went on and on weaving intricate yet unfeasible stories based on all of her travels in the past. One minute in Las Vegas, then LA, then in Maine. It made me wonder how that mind of her works. It’s all in there she just can’t put it together correctly. Trudy knows and can see how far Mom has slipped into another world. She takes extra time and gives Mom special attention. I tipped her a little extra.

We went to the bank to try and get my sister’s loan processed. The paperwork wasn’t ready yet.

My sister came home with us to watch Mom while I went to pick up a new TV with a friend. While I was gone my sister says Mom tried to leave to go home at least four times. She would walk with her and guide her back home. The afternoon Zanax puts her to sleep on the sofa and she is in bed by 7pm.

Doctor Visit Thursday October 25, 2012

The doctor had called the night before to suggest we go in for an EKG before she say us on Thursday morning. The test run the week before along with blood work had some abnormalities she wasn’t happy with and wanted to see if they continued. When I mentioned we would discuss her hip and leg pain, she also ordered an x-ray of her hips.

So we got on the road early and stopped by McDonalds for a coffee and Egg McMuffin before going to the lab for the tests. Mom was in a good mood and enjoyed going out for breakfast, even on the run. I noticed she was reluctant to drink her coffee even after I had cooled it with ice. She had been choking on liquids for some time and had really reduced her drinking lately. It was one of the things on our list to discuss with the doctor. I know Dad had a problem drinking thin fluids after his stroke so I was familiar with the issue.

When we got to the lab so early we got right in for the x-ray. I was planning to wait in the out waiting area and the nurse took Mom back for the x-ray. Within a couple of minutes she was out asking me to join them in the back. Mom was disoriented and confused. So I went back to get her ready for the EKG – putting on the gown and waiting for the technician. The test went quick and we were off to the doctor’s office test results in hand.

We were early and there was about a half an hour wait. As always, with waiting, Mom was very impatient. She wants to be going all the time. Several times she wanted to leave. She got irritated we needed to wait and upset when other people went back and we didn’t yet. Finally the nurse called us back and got Mom and I into an examination room. We waited another fifteen minutes. The nurse buzzed in and out doing blood pressure and meds history. The time went fast to me but to Mom it seemed an eternity. She continued to complain she didn’t know why she was there and had to wait.

When the doctor came is she still wasn’t happy with the EKG results. There were a couple of issues, one old and familiar but a new one had cropped up. She wanted to change the meds taking away some of the anti-depressant and anti-psychotic. But she added another Zanax the one that makes her calm and sleep. So now she will get one at 2pm and another about 7pm. Effectively it will make her sleepy all day so we won’t be going out much. After discussion of the swallow issues the doctor ordered a swallow test to be done at the hospital. We went over all of the meds again and doctor understood the progression of the congestive heart disease and repeated swelling of the ankles. It’s something left to me to monitor.

Finally we left and I made a quick stop at the Social Security office to get information on getting a new card. I had lost mine and needed it now. It was a quick hop in and out the door learning they didn’t do them at my west side office. I need to go downtown or north valley to get a new card. I could see Mom in the car waiting the entire time and she was fine in a cool shady spot. When I returned she was fine and I thought it would be an easy stop for me to pick up paint I needed on the way home. Home Depot wasn’t busy and again I left her in the car with the windows down. It was for all of five minutes as I ran in grabbed what I needed, went through self check-out and ran to the car. As I opened the car door she looked at me with a shocked look and said, “Who are you?” She really didn’t know who I was at that moment. As I started the car she insisted that this was her daughter’s car and I had to get out. I drove away thinking getting home was the best bet. We live just across the road. She continued to objet as if I were a car jacker and she began to attempt to get out of the car as I drove on to the main road. She failed to get the door open or her seat belt off and I got to our driveway in less than a minute. My brother-in-law, Fred, was working on his truck in the driveway next door. I told her to ask Fred who I was. And as soon as he said I was her daughter, she said of course I am her daughter, as if nothing had just happened.  I was beginning to think I was the one who needed a Zanax!

Holiday Plans Low Key

Wednesday October 17 2012

After discussions with my Alzheimer’s experts I have decided we will have a very low key holiday season this year. It is all too much for Mom to handle. So if it is okay with all of you, we will not do any big dinners, gatherings, gifts or tree. We need to stay away from shiny and fluttering things like bows and gift wrap, ornaments and flashing lights. All of them tend to stress Alzheimer’s patients and Mom is very far out on the edge now. She is anxious and upset all of the time. She wants to go home so bad she is running out on me several times a day now. And her attitude is severally depressed and negative. Everything is always wrong and off-setting to her. So we need to keep everything calm and routine. She may need even more than the double Zanax she is getting now which will put her to sleep earlier.   Just so you know her bed time is 7PM these days and she sleeps in till about 7-8AM most mornings. Her congestive heart failure is worse and I give her water pills frequently to keep the fluid retention down. She’s up to 140 pounds today, up from 125 after her last hospital stay. We are watching her close. She goes to the doctor again on Oct 25^th. In fact we will go get blood work done today.

Afternoon Sundowner Stress New Heights

Afternoon Sundowner Stress New Heights Tuesday October 16, 2012

It seemed to start from early in the morning and by noon was out of control. She wanted to go home to her mother now and would take no excuses to leaving. I called her sister to get her calmed down and that lasted for all of 2 minutes after hanging up. Then we took a drive at 2PM because she insisted her mother’s house was nearby. After about 10 minutes of driving the area including all of their old houses, we decided to go see Daddy at the cemetery. His plaque was done, but wrong. They said WWII not Korea. Mom didn’t acknowledge it was her husband and wanted to leave shortly after arriving. I was too emotional to stay long as well. The combination of seeing his name there and her not understanding any of it was too much. Plus I was so exhausted from a day of stress dealing with her anger and anxiety. So we went home and invited ourselves to dinner with Fred and I had a large beer! Mom had Coke with riblets and onion rings. Although she was still distressed when we came home, she was tired enough to go to bed.