Everyday a little after four in the afternoon the Alzheimer's symptom known as "Sundowner" hits. All of a sudden Mom has the urge to go home. But she is home. This happened even before she moved into my home last December. Here it is October and she still isn't used to this being her home.
Distraction is about all that helps. Some days I let her walk next door to my sister's home. This makes her feel she has her freedom to do as she wishes and it makes her happy. My sister or one of my nieces or nephew usually walk her home half an hour later. Their home is busy with lots of activity, large dogs, kids, loud video games and such. So she can only take it for a short time before she is ready for the tranquility of where she had come from earlier in the day. Not that it feels like home. I take her through each room pointing out her furniture, which we took into my home, requiring me to get rid of my furniture which I loved. She recognizes her paintings and photos. Then we look at her bedroom and all of her clothes in the closet. Finally we join her husband, my dad in the TV room. Sometimes she doesn't recognize him and I need to point out the couples photos of the two of them over the years. The best thing I ever did was make a bound photo book on www.shutterfly.com that has all of our family pics in chronological order with the year under each, their couple portraits over the years, our houses with street address and years in order and recent celebrations like their 60th Wedding Anniversary Party photos. It lays out the family history, their history and recent events clearly. Her favorite pic is the birthday lobster dinner last September for her 81st birthday.
Once we go through the entire history the water works usually stop and we can get on with dinner. Some days it takes looking at old photo albums and old familiar music to calm her down. Occasionally I have had to put her to bed early because of the hysterics. She actually makes herself sick.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Protecting the Purse
The Purse - Mom has this black crochet purse that she has been carrying for at least the last ten years. She has become obsessed with hiding her purse so no one steals her money -of which there is little kept in her purse. So several times a day she moves her purse from the night stand drawer to the dresser drawer to beside her chair to the closet to another dresser drawer to the china hutch to another chair. And several times a day she can't remember where she last put, it so we all play the game of find the purse before she breaks out in hysterics.
Next we play the game of looking at the reading glasses and sun glasses and switching cases.
Somehow she has managed to accumulate a ton of cosmetics in her purse and sometimes a pair of panties and socks. I think that is for the quick escape plan!
Alzheimer's is so strange in the way it plays with the mind one day and then does something different on another day. If she has something to look forward to like going to Bingo or church, she seems much more under control.
Next we play the game of looking at the reading glasses and sun glasses and switching cases.
Somehow she has managed to accumulate a ton of cosmetics in her purse and sometimes a pair of panties and socks. I think that is for the quick escape plan!
Alzheimer's is so strange in the way it plays with the mind one day and then does something different on another day. If she has something to look forward to like going to Bingo or church, she seems much more under control.
Shower
I was on the phone with a client making her airline reservations when I heard the water turn on in the shower downstairs. "Gotta go" and dropped the phone and I ran down the stairs knowing I had to get there before she tried to get into the shower.
The problem is with her Alzheimers, she doesn't remember that she had hip surgery not too long ago and she can not lift her left leg into the tub to take a shower. I wish we had a walk in handicap shower like they had in their Sun City home, but we don't. I have been tempted to add another "shower room" in the garage by the hot water heater, but that hasn't been practical yet.
Anyway she had already managed to climb into the tub holding on to the handicap railing and the shower chair. Sometimes she amazes me with what she can do. I know that had to hurt like the dickens.
"You should have told me you were going to take a shower," I said to her as I pull a towel off the bar to soak the water flooding the floor."I'm not a baby! I can do it myself!" she says. Then she is confused which is the shampoo and which is the conditioner. She dumps a handful of conditioner on the tub floor and I quickly take the shower hand held spray to wash it out before she slips on it. I wish we had a better shower hand held unit that would stretch lower and hold itself in place. Maybe a scissor like unit that you can push in or pull out. I will have to look for that.
So I get her the shampoo and we manage to get her scrubbed up, rinsed and carefully out of the tub. It is harder getting out than in.
Then in the mirror she surprises herself. "Is that me!" She is an old lady and recalls being much younger. "Look at this skin just hanging on me!" She has lost over 50 pounds in about 6 months after her surgery and congestive heart failure. It is a shock every time she looks in a mirror.
The problem is with her Alzheimers, she doesn't remember that she had hip surgery not too long ago and she can not lift her left leg into the tub to take a shower. I wish we had a walk in handicap shower like they had in their Sun City home, but we don't. I have been tempted to add another "shower room" in the garage by the hot water heater, but that hasn't been practical yet.
Anyway she had already managed to climb into the tub holding on to the handicap railing and the shower chair. Sometimes she amazes me with what she can do. I know that had to hurt like the dickens.
"You should have told me you were going to take a shower," I said to her as I pull a towel off the bar to soak the water flooding the floor."I'm not a baby! I can do it myself!" she says. Then she is confused which is the shampoo and which is the conditioner. She dumps a handful of conditioner on the tub floor and I quickly take the shower hand held spray to wash it out before she slips on it. I wish we had a better shower hand held unit that would stretch lower and hold itself in place. Maybe a scissor like unit that you can push in or pull out. I will have to look for that.
So I get her the shampoo and we manage to get her scrubbed up, rinsed and carefully out of the tub. It is harder getting out than in.
Then in the mirror she surprises herself. "Is that me!" She is an old lady and recalls being much younger. "Look at this skin just hanging on me!" She has lost over 50 pounds in about 6 months after her surgery and congestive heart failure. It is a shock every time she looks in a mirror.
Alzheimers Day
As a Caregiver I deal with Alzheimer everyday.
There are 7 stages of Alzheimer disease and my Mom is at stage 5 to 6. That is the point where she can't recognize us and can't recall what you said to her one minute ago. She needs constant attention. Every afternoon at about 4pm she experiences what they call "sundowners syndrome" where she tries to leave. She wants to go home, but doesn't know where home is. She and Dad moved in with me last December. Now I wish we had made the move earlier as she would have been likely to adjust better before the disease progressed so far. Although when I think back she was doing the I want to go home bit when living in their Sun City home which they had been in for over ten years. So the "I want to go home" situation would probably have happened anywhere she was living, not just here.
Caregivers know it is a full time job between waking, dressing, meals, meds, therapy, managing stress, and coping with the anxiety. The patient knows they are losing their memory and grieve daily. It's harder than caring for an infant because they can walk and get into things and have such strong emotions. And in my case it's also hard because it's my mother.
Some of the tools that have been most useful include:
1. My sister is close by and comes to help ease the stress. All of the family has been wonderful at spending time with Mom. The most valuable thing they do is sit and talk to her. Talking about the family and the past are most soothing.
2. A picture book of family and homes in chronological order. It provides reminders of where we have lived and who is who in the family. We especially like watching the children as they grew each year in the family pictures. Most important are the pictures of my Dad as he matured. She has a hard time accepting the old man she sees everyday is her husband.
3. Family birthday and anniversary celebrations. Marking occasions with a gathering (not too big) and pictures. Never before have photo albums been viewed so often.
I wish Mom had a hobby she would enjoy but nothing seems to interest her. Folding laundry is her favorite pass time. Sometimes I get her to peel potatoes or carrots but her hands are so weak and arthritic it is hard for her to do that anymore.
There are several websites and blogs that offer advice that has been helpful. And Mom's doctor has been very supportive. If you have any good ideas let me know! email lasharpe@cox.net
There are 7 stages of Alzheimer disease and my Mom is at stage 5 to 6. That is the point where she can't recognize us and can't recall what you said to her one minute ago. She needs constant attention. Every afternoon at about 4pm she experiences what they call "sundowners syndrome" where she tries to leave. She wants to go home, but doesn't know where home is. She and Dad moved in with me last December. Now I wish we had made the move earlier as she would have been likely to adjust better before the disease progressed so far. Although when I think back she was doing the I want to go home bit when living in their Sun City home which they had been in for over ten years. So the "I want to go home" situation would probably have happened anywhere she was living, not just here.
Caregivers know it is a full time job between waking, dressing, meals, meds, therapy, managing stress, and coping with the anxiety. The patient knows they are losing their memory and grieve daily. It's harder than caring for an infant because they can walk and get into things and have such strong emotions. And in my case it's also hard because it's my mother.
Some of the tools that have been most useful include:
1. My sister is close by and comes to help ease the stress. All of the family has been wonderful at spending time with Mom. The most valuable thing they do is sit and talk to her. Talking about the family and the past are most soothing.
2. A picture book of family and homes in chronological order. It provides reminders of where we have lived and who is who in the family. We especially like watching the children as they grew each year in the family pictures. Most important are the pictures of my Dad as he matured. She has a hard time accepting the old man she sees everyday is her husband.
3. Family birthday and anniversary celebrations. Marking occasions with a gathering (not too big) and pictures. Never before have photo albums been viewed so often.
I wish Mom had a hobby she would enjoy but nothing seems to interest her. Folding laundry is her favorite pass time. Sometimes I get her to peel potatoes or carrots but her hands are so weak and arthritic it is hard for her to do that anymore.
There are several websites and blogs that offer advice that has been helpful. And Mom's doctor has been very supportive. If you have any good ideas let me know! email lasharpe@cox.net
Monday, September 19, 2011
Doctor Visit
September 19, 2011
Mom and Dad both went to see their Primary Care Physician and had blood work drawn. Everything is fine and we are staying the course with meds. As I look back in my date book I am depressed at how many events I wanted to attend in the last year and were crossed off at the last minute due to caregiver duties. One or the other weren’t feeling well enough for me to leave them with a sitter. My income has suffered dramatically. I haven’t made hardly anything this year. I need to get out and meet new prospects and make demos to make sales. It’s a good thing Dad is picking up the household expenses and food. My concern is once he is gone how will we survive?
Friday, August 12, 2011
Convention in LA
August 12, 2011
I got away for almost a week with Gina covering for me with Mom and Dad. At first I was obsessed with calling and checking in – but what could I do from California. And Gina is more than capable of handling anything that would come up. So I finally relaxed and had a good time at my Kangen water convention learning all about how alkaline ionized water is healthy.Sunday, March 20, 2011
Hospital
March 20, 2011
The entire day was spent in the hospital as Mom became weak and could not keep liquid down. She was so dehydrated and dizzy. They gave her an IV and antibiotics for a bladder infection. It was a whole day of just sitting and waiting for test results in a waiting room chair. So exhausting.
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